Friday, July 08, 2005

dizzy

I've been off balance for a couple of weeks now and assumed it was allergies. When they affect my ears I can have trouble walking a straight line. Now, however, I've been dizzy.

There's been a lot happening, to be sure : dating, work, my writing, school plans, etc. There's a lot to do and I'm feeling overwhelmed and wonder if that's why I'm dizzy. For once I don't have insomnia, which usually lets me gets lots of work done, but sleep is not the best either.

I did get a much-needed laugh from my friend Sebastian who always asks me how my dating life is going (he likes to see me having fun, what can I say?). We talked about how women like to tie down a partner but that, as he said "los caribenas son pocas putitas". And Robyn tells me that as a air sign I'm hard to tie down. Get it, air? Can't tie air down. I didn't get it until she explained to me what "air" meant. I'm Libra. I thought the whole first minute she was saying I talked too much.

To be honest, talking with Sebastian stirred up my own reminders to complete my schooling, and decide on my next course of action. His call also let me know that he, as my brother, would be moving far away for school. I'm going to miss him. He's my brother and there's no denying it. He was and continues to be part of an active part of my heart.

There is so much going on, so many mental challenges, that I can't help but see them as this approaching storm. Appropriate that, out of nowhere, Austin was hit with a tremendous rain last night. I was just walking out of this meeting as a coalition develops to address the upcoming vote to add a definition of marriage to the Texas Constitution (the old one man + one woman = marriage mierda). I just stepped out of the door and these huge, gorgeous drops of rain came down. I thought it would be a quick shower and was thankful. Yesterday's temperature hit 104 here - any relief is nice - and I don't remember the last time it rained. Well, by the time I got to the highway the downpour was so severe everyone was driving 30 mph and I couldn't see more than a few feet and everyone's brake lights. Wipers were of no use.

I ended up at a friend's house, unintended, to unwind some. I hoped that by chilling with a friend I'd get rid of some of the tension of returning to real life after a week in SF. Well, we had a "discussion" that left me upset. Shit, that's another story. Forget it.

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